DAVID #16-(1 Sam. 30:1-20)-"HOW TO HANDLE CRITICISM"
Intro: Criticism! No one like to receive it, but it will come anyway! Regardless of how well you live your life or try to conduct yourself in front of others, there will always be those around you who will find something to criticize.   Who can forget the life of Job? Here was a man that the Lord called "perfect and upright, and one that feared God and escheweth evil." Yet, when various calamities fell upon his life and Job's friends came to be with him, all they could find to do to Job was to criticize him.  Yet, through it all, Job stuck with the Lord and never turned on God. As a result, he was restored and blessed by God.
Have you ever been criticized by others? Of course you have! And, you will be again! When it comes your way, you need to know how to respond...because I have found that many cant hanle it!!!-(If you have a difficult time with your attitude when you are criticised then you don't EVER need to become a DEACON, PREACHER, SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER or Missionary!)
In this passage, we find David on the run from King Saul. He has fled to the land of the Philistines and is waiting there for the Lord to deliver to him the kingdom of Israel. During this time, there arose a series of events that lead to David being criticized by his own people. In fact, verse 6 tells us that they were even talking about stoning David to death over this thing.---(A few weeks ago, a new pastor tape recorded a private meeting plotting his removal!) 
(1)-(v. 1-5)- THE REASON FOR THEIR CRITICISM
A. 29:1-5 A Misguided Decision --David probably had no business trying to help the Philistines defeat Israel. Whatever his reasoning, David was leading his troops to fight against their own people. When things turned out as the did, his men were justified in questioning David's decision.   When criticism comes your way, one of the main things you need to ask yourself is, "Is this true?" Instead of reacting defensively against your critic, try to put yourself in their shoes for a moment and try to see the issue through their eyes. It may be that they are right!
B. V. 1-3 A Military Defeat--When these men returned home, they found that their town had been destroyed by the Amalekites. To the minds of these men David was responsible for this event.   Apparently David was doing what he thought was right. However, those around him saw things a different way. We just need to remember that not everyone will agree with us all the time. There will always be those who could do it better, or who would do it differently....WOULD YOU DO A BETTER JOB PASTORING THIS CHURCH???
John Wesley was deeply disturbed by people who seemed to enjoy criticizing others, especially those who were in the Lord's work. Once while he was preaching, he noticed a lady in the congregation who was well known for her critical attitude. All through the service she sat and stared at his new tie. When the meeting was ended, she came up to him and said very sharply, "Mr. Wesley, the strings on your bow tie are much too long. It's an offense to me!" He asked if any of the ladies present happened to have a pair of scissors in their purse. When they were handed to him, he gave them to the critic and ask her to trim the streamers to her liking.   After she clipped them off near the collar, he said, "Are you sure they're right now?" "Yes", she said, "that's much better!" "Then let me have those shears a moment," said Wesley. "I'm sure you wouldn't mind if I also give you a bit of correction. I don't mean to be cruel, but I must tell you, madam, that your tongue is an offense to me - it's too long! Please stick it out, I'd like to trim some off." Of course, Wesley didn't follow through on his threat, but he sure made his point!)...People can sure dish it out, but they can't take it!!!
C. V. 4-5 A Monumental Discouragement - When the tragedy is discovered, the men weep until they can weep no more and needing a scapegoat, they turn on David, v. 6. However, what they failed to realize, and the Bible points this put, David's wives were among those taken captive. They were simply concerned with themselves and refused to see the bigger picture....(Jesus talked about "staining at a gnat and swallowing a camel")!

Such is the way with critics! Very often, they are so caught up in themselves, how they feel, what is happening to them and how they are being affected that they cannot see things objectively.  The best way to deal with this is to do what David did: Don't respond to your critic!-(Don't lash out and argue!  That shows your own immaturities and weakness!!!)   One fellow put it this way, "If criticism had has any real power to harm, the skunk would be extinct by now."
(2)-(v. 6)- THE REACTION TO THEIR CRITICISM
A. A Heavy Heart - David is bothered by their reaction. He has suffered just as much loss as they have. His heart was broken that the people had turned on him.  A critic will use criticism as a means of raising himself in the eyes of others....(i.e.-"I am the one who is important around here"!)  One has said, "It is a dead giveaway when you meet a person who is always criticizing and finding fault with another brother. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred he's trying to divert attention from his own sins by pointing an accusing finger at someone else."
Unfair and unjust criticism always has a way of striking you right in the heart. It is painful, when you have done your best, to know that someone is observing your life to find fault. It is natural to be bothered by criticism. However, criticism should never be allowed to control your life.   (Ill. The wife of a hard to please husband was determined to satisfy him for just one day. "Darling", she asked, "what would you like for breakfast this morning?" He growled, "Coffee and toast, grits and sausage, and two eggs - one scrambled and one fried." She soon had the food on the table and waited for a word of praise. After a quick glance at his plate, he exclaimed, "Well, if you didn't scramble the wrong egg!" The moral? Some people will never be happy no matter what you do, no matter what you say, no matter to what lengths you go to in order to satisfy them. People like that are not worth you're the time!!!-(I'm not here for the WHINERS...I am here for the LOST, for the CHRISTIAN who isn't KNIT-PICKING all the time!!!)
B. A Humble Heart - Please note that David did not respond to his critics! He was upset and hurt but he did not retaliate.  (Remember, 10% of life is what happens....90% of it is how you RESPOND to what happens!  You can't control the attitude and mouth of a critic...but you cna control and WILL BE JUDGED on how you respond!!!)  The best response to criticism is no response at all!
C. A Hopeful Heart - When David did react, notice how it came about. David turned to the Lord and called on His name!  If the truth be known, many of you have taken into your own hands to handle a problem instead of praying for your critic!!!-(YOU VENT instead of PRAYING!!!)
(3)-(v. 7-20)- THE RESULTS OF THEIR CRITICISM
A. V. 7-10 David's Faith Was Visible - When the critics began their harassment of David, he responded by turning to the Lord in prayer!  There is a lesson here for you and me. When we are criticized and attacked, our best response is simply to carry on with business s usual! Just keep on serving God and be what the Lord has saved you to be. He will bless that attitude more than He could ever bless an attitude of bitterness and one that lashes out at its enemies!
B. V. 11-17 David's Faith Was Vindicated - David, through the providence of the Lord was lead in the right direction and he and his men found the Amalekites and they defeated them. Because David refused to get caught up in little personal battles, God was able to use him in a great way to secure victory for himself and for the people!--(Mt. Nebo Church has TOO MUCH GOOD STUFF GOING ON for me to get sidetracked in petty...trivial arguements!!!)
C. V. 18-20 David's Faith Was Victorious - These verses tell us about the great victory that the Lord gave to David. Did you notice that they recovered everything, v. 18-19? Did you also notice who got the credit on a human level, v. 18-20? David got the credit! Now, those men who wanted to stone him and were critical of his life were forced to admit that David was right.
*WHAT DO WE LEARN ABOUT HANDLING CRITICISM???
1. Accept criticism as inevitable.
2. Carefully examine the source of every criticism. Some may be valid, but many are not! Ask yourself, "Who is the one saying this thing?"--("consider the source"!)
3. Decide not to take criticism personally. Look at it objectively and try to learn from it. Ask yourself, "Is there any truth to this?"
4. Commit the matter to the Lord and with His help rise above it! Allow Him to vindicate you in His own time and in His own way. If we fail to cope with criticism, we will become like our critics!